Kick Ass Salads

In my house, we usually eat heavier in the evenings. I know you're not "supposed" to eat heavier at night, but I live with a dude who isn't a big fan of salads, so I have them at lunch when he's not around.

This week, I had two AMAZING salads so I wanted to brag, er, share.


First, a taco salad:


I started with a bowl of spinach and added:
black beans
corn
onions
tomatoes
green peppers
roasted red peppers
about 1/2 ounce of shredded pepper jack cheese
a couple spoons of salsa
a handful of crumbled up tortilla chips (great way to use up the crumbs at the bottom of the bag, which, for us, usually end up in the composter). I would have added avocado if we had one, but we were out.

I added some hot sauce on top too, for a little extra kick. I had this last week and then made it for Andrew to take to work this week and he LOVED it. Since he usually hates salads, I consider this a victory. You could add some chicken or beef if you want a protein boost. But this was perfectly satisfying for me AND kept me full until dinner.

Then, there was this summer salad:
Sorry the photo is crappy, I took it with my blackberry (which I still don't really know how to use, but at least I look cool trying).

Anyhow, this is a lighter version of a salad that I make in the fall, it doesn't have a name.

Again, I started with a bowl of spinach. Then I added:

1/2 chopped apple
a few tablespoons of dried cranberries (these are awesome in ANYTHING, but best in salads and yogurt parfaits. You could use any dried berry, really.)
cherries (fresh ones. with the pits. they're a pain in the ass to cut up, but totally worth it).
1/2 ounce of gorgonzola crumbles
a tablespoon of almond slivers
dash of balsamic dressing (I'm obsessed with Trader Joes').

I've also made this salad with strawberries and onions (a tasty combo) or any other berries that I have on hand.

I should also mention that for me to really enjoy a salad, it needs to have something a little creamy in it; either cheese or a creamy dressing or something like avocado or chickpeas (which have a similar consistency). This is also an easy way to cut calories because often times, I'll use it in place of a dressing (like in the taco salad). For the second salad, I only use a dash of dressing, but I could have easily just used plain balsamic vinegar and it would have been just as tasty. AAAAND 1/2 an ounce of shredded or crumbled cheese has about half the fat and calories as an oil-based dressing.
Things like salsa, hot sauce, lemon juice and salt and pepper also give salads a kick with minimal calories (I might skip these on any salads with fruit though. Balsamic is really the best compliment to fruit, I think).

As a rule, I always ask for dressing on the side when I order salads. Not only do I end up using less, but I really hate the puddle of dressing at the bottom of the bowl, and too much dressing makes the greens soggy, which I think is kind of gross and really unappetizing.

I think salads are a super quick and easy way to get creative with meals. And I'm a little lazy like that.
What are your favorite salad combos?? Maybe I'll try some new ones and "review" them here!

Oh, and have an awesome loooooong weekend! My goal is to not overdo it with delicious BBQ food and beer. At 4:30, I will have achieved my workout goal for the week, so I'm feeling pretty good heading into the weekend. But, beer has been known to ruin pretty much everything I plan to do (like workout, sleep, and be responsible).

Happy Memorial Day!

Creative Juicesssss

I'm wondering what all (5) of you do to get your creative juices flowing.

What inspires you?
Do you make crafty things? Do you build? Cook?

Do set aside time to do these things? Or do you just wait until the mood strikes?

I think I need some new hobbies.

So please share!

I love Laughing Cow!!!

I LOVE IT!

35 calories and 2 grams of fat in each wedge!

Finally, my cheese addiction can coexist peacefully with my goal of losing 15 pounds before my wedding.

Get some! (I recommend the garlic & herb)

Even if this looks like a cop-out post...

it isn't.

The always insightful MizFit has an awesome post today about this book, You'd Be So Pretty if...

II haven't read it but I know that it is a MUST read for everyone, dudes included.

I know I'm not the only chick who's ever been afraid that she's going to mess her kids up in a zillion possible ways. But something about the topic of body image and acceptance really strikes a chord in me. It's no secret that I dabbled with an eating disorder for many years. And I have spent thousands of dollars in therapy wondering where it came from. I would be lying if I said my mother had nothing to do with it. No, I don't blame her for it. But watching her eat in secret and then not eat at all and then go on an Arby's binge definitely set the stage for my bizarre relationship with food. It was like food was evil, or bad, and would inevitably make me fat.

My mom was 130 pounds when she married my dad. I hit 130 in like, 7th grade. As a mom struggling with her own weight, that must have been disappointing for her on some level. Maybe she was trying to protect me from the name calling and the ostracizing, but to me it felt like disapproval.
She never shied away from saying things like "you could live off the fat of the land for awhile" and she never, ever let me wear horizontal stripes. She never outright called me fat, but I knew what she thought. I knew by the way she looked at me when I decided to have a Pop Tart for a snack instead of an apple. I knew when I'd try on clothes and she'd give me this look of disgusted indifference as she said "its just not flattering." At first, I hid behind food. But after years of being picked on, not having a boyfriend and never being able to borrow anyone's clothes, I turned away from food altogether. I clearly had no willpower to only eat good things so I decided to just not eat at all. But I didn't have the willpower for that either, and thus I began the life of a "functional" bulimic. Sure I was a cranky bitch all the time, but I was thinner than I had ever been and it was worth it. Then.

When I look back I am horrified at how it all transpired. I was so conscious of what I was doing; it was like some giant cost benefit analysis of my life. That made me cry a lot.

I see now that there was a definite lack of education around food for my sisters and I growing up. And our only feminine role model was painfully insecure and unhappy herself. We didn't exercise; no one in our family did. Because when you're 6, you can only ride your bike up and down the driveway so many times by yourself...

I do think that I have a healthy relationship with food now. I'm not skinny, but I'm active and healthy and slowly learning to appreciate all of the amazing things that my not skinny body can do (I've heard childbirth is going to be a breeze).
But I'm still a little nervous. Because I know that healthy active lifestyles start at home. And they start before the baby is even born. Am I properly equipped to raise healthy, active, intelligent children who love themselves? What will I do when my daughter comes home crying because some 6th grade boy called her fat? What will I say? How do I suggest a healthy alternative to a Twinkie without judging, or hurting feelings, or adding in all of the personal meanings that a suggestion like that would hold for me?

I have given up my disordered eating, for sure. But there is a part of me that knows if things get REALLY bad and I get REALLY fat, I always have it to fall back on.

Messed up, I know.

But I also know that having kids takes that fall back plan out of existence. Kids see, hear, sense and REPEAT everything (if you don't believe me, I'll introduce you to my nephew, Nathan). I know that to lead by example means that I don't get to take the easy way out. And that makes me a little nervous, too.
But in a good way.

So if I don't win the book on her site (because, I seriously never win ANYTHING), I'm going to buy it. And when I'm done, I'm going to make Andrew read it, even if I have to hold him down and paper clip his eyes open.
Because this is a topic far too overlooked in this age of airbrushing and Top Models and Maxim. And it is about time we (men included) started to have a conversation about it.
And because I don't want any daughter of mine (or yours, or anyone) to go through what I(and millions of other women around the globe) did.

So WHAT?

So WHAT if I didn't work out every single day this week like I promised myself I would.

So WHAT if I ate french fries for dinner last night (and half a bottle of wine).

So WHAT if I sometimes don't shower until 5pm (I work from home).

So WHAT if I am sitting in my kitchen without any pants on.

So WHAT if I talk to my cats (and I'm pretty sure that Charlie has an imaginary friend).

So WHAT if it has taken me 4+ months to get 3/4 of the way through Atlas Shrugged (and so WHAT if I don't think its the greatest book I've ever read).

So WHAT if I did all the laundry and then didn't fold it (for over a week).

So WHAT if I forgot my reusable grocery totes when I went to the store (just this ONCE).

So WHAT if I hate emptying the dishwasher.

So WHAT if I drank 3 cups of coffee and still want to take a nap on my lunch break.

I'm not angry. Its just Friday. So I'm giving myself a break. Nobody's perfect.
Happy May Day!
(feel free to add your own "So WHAT's"

Trippin'

No, not on drugs!



This is a health-ish type blog, people!


I'm talking about the things that trip me up from eating right, getting to the gym, being an overall pillar of health and wellness....you know?

SO I'm going to list mine. 'Cuse I'm all about accountability and full disclosure here.

Then maybe those (5) of you who read this can list your things. And then I won't feel so lame. And alone.

Things that make me trip:

1) beer, wine, vodka, gin....(man, I sound like a total alcoholic).
It's not just the empty calories that trip me up here, its the hangovers ( apparently I am not 21 anymore) that make me want to lay in bed all the next day and eat french fries and stay as far away from physical activity as possible.

2) going out to eat.
Usually, going out to eat includes drinking. But aside from that, I am just seriously terrible at making good choices when faced with a menu that includes sweet potato fries, nachos and chicken wings. Sometimes I will get a salad AND one of these things (to make me feel less guilty) but you and I both know which one I eat more of. (DAMN YOU, NACHOS! Nachos make me weak.)

3) the rain.
It makes me want to crawl up on the couch with a book (or re-runs of the Hills).
It's raining today.

4) BBQs.
Potato salad, burgers with billions of fixins, mac and cheese, beer, a table full of desserts...
You get the idea.

5) my job.
I have to travel a lot for my new job. Which is great/exciting. Except that it's usually day trips that have me in a car/train/bus for hours and hours (with no access to even stairs let alone a gym.) By the time I get home, I'm beat. And the last thing I feel like doing is working out. It is challenging (often impossible) to organize work out time around my "real" work schedule.
It is also hard to make good food choices when all you have to pick from is a vending machine and a bagel joint.

I have probably 13 more things that I could list here. But I've made myself feel sufficiently unmotivated for today (see #3).

So what makes you guys "trip?"

Gone and Done It

Last week, I shelled out a whole bunch of money on myself.
No, not on shoes.
On a personal trainer.

I had a trial workout session with him last week and it was GREAT! Everything was designed for me and the things I want to accomplish. He even took the time to get in touch with my chiropractor before our workout so that he could find out more about my back issues and suggest exercises that would help alleviate some of my back pain, instead of making it worse.

I came home feeling great, but I was hesitant about spending the money.



And then I thought about how I can justify just about everything I spend money on (Examples: I need new tank tops for summer BUT its a good investment because I can also wear them all winter to layer. And, its hard to find a time when all of my friends can be together so dinner out is worth it. And, these shoes will go with my nicer work clothes BUT I can also wear them with jeans and dresses.) Justifying spending money is seriously a piece of cake for me. I do it without even knowing that I'm doing it. (The weird thing is that I'm also really good at talking myself OUT of buying stuff, too. But that's another post.)

So why was I having such a hard time justifying spending money on my health?

The hypocrisy of the situation became too apparent to ignore. So I marched myself back to the gym and slapped down my plastic. Yes, I will probably have to forgo a cute summer sundress or two, or a couple pitchers of margaritas.

But it's (I'm) worth it. Eh?

Back on the Buggg

Remember this guy? Ahhhh, my old friend, Body Bugg. Oh how I have ignored you sitting there on my nightstand for the past 1.5 months....



Time's up! I gotta get my butt back in gear. I have put back on all but 9 of the original pounds I lost. I'm feeling gross (Yes, I know that "gross" is not actually a feeling), and my clothes are a little tight and I know exactly what's to blame.

Its the little snacking bites of this...and that. And the random glasses of wine. And the "forgetting" to measure food. And the "forgetting" to log it. BUT NO MORE! The weather is getting gorgeous and I have lots of cute Spring clothes in my closet that I bought when I was 10 pounds lighter. And I'll be damned if I'm not getting into them!

No more excuses! I have taken on so many other parts of my life that I'm not satisfied with in the past few months. Everything, it seems, but my weight. That ends now. But I need your help, blog world!
I need accountability!
I need workouts that are different...and fun!
I need to not eat so much cheese!

Think wedding dress. Think wedding dress.....

On Why I'm Moving to Utah

Hey-o blog world!

Have you ever considered moving to Utah? Me either. Until a friend of mine went to visit and came back to report that in Utah, she is 5 pounds lighter! Heck yes! I'm guessing it has something to do with altitude, or maybe all that salt they got out there. Either way, I'll take it. Utah's department of tourism should really get on this. I think a good slogan would be, "Utah. Its good for your self esteem."

But I digress.


I am officially registered for the Susan G Komen Race for the Cure. I will be running the 5k. In college, Susan G Komen was my sorority's philanthropy, so its a cause that I have always felt very connected to. Earlier this month, my friend's mom passed away from breast cancer. She was an AMAZINg woman, and she fought the cancer for many years. This race really means a lot to me and I am running on a team in her honor. I have raised almost 20% of my goal so far, but I know that I can do more.

If anyone is feeling generous and wants to support me in my fundraising (and fitness) goals, I would be more than appreciative. Here is the link to my page: Support Becky in Race for the Cure

I've been running about 4 miles every other day to get ready for the race in May. I still need to shave about 7 minutes off my 5k time. Its a lot to do in a month, but I'm confident. I have been advised by my doctors to not run every day, so I've been mixing it up with intervals on the erg, weights and the evil, er, lovely Jillian Michaels. But I know once it gets closer, I'm going to need to be running more than 3-4 days a week. But then I have almost 2 months before my
next 5k, which is in June and is part of a relay triathalon for charity.
I know 5ks may seem wimpy to some of you who run much, much farther, but I haven't actually participated in any kind of athletic competition in about 4 years, so this is a big deal for me. I'm starting small. Then maybe next year I'll take on the Broad Street Run...

Scales, Knees and Arthiritis-OH MY!

Its official, blog world. I am falling apart. And it's only natural. I mean, I DID just turn 29. I'm on the downward slope of my bell curve life.

I am really going to set my scale on fire. I got on it yesterday for the first time in a month or so and it read me a number so low, I hadn't seen it on a scale I was standing on since middle school. I immediately began celebrating and feeling awesome about myself (although in the back of my head questioning the validity of the number because I am still not in my skinny jeans and this number would have really let me fit in my skinny jeans).
I had a doctor's appointment in the afternoon, where I was just praying for the validation that my (formerly) evil scale had just given me. Oh but the doctor's scale hates me too. And I am far heavier than I thought. I have gained back all but 10 measly little pounds. And now I am back to being disappointed with myself again. Why, oh why, do we let numbers affect our feelings? (note to self: work on this).

I may have mentioned in my last post about my arthritis. I got diagnosed with it (in my knees) when I was 20. At the time, it was no big deal. I was in college, rowing, running and competing every weekend. Now, at 29, it feels like a death sentence.
When I was first diagnosed, I was given a prescription to manage the pain and inflammation. It made me see black spots. So I stopped taking it and began a years-long dependency to ibuprofen, glucosamine, and ice.
For many many years this worked pretty well. But recently, my knees are having none of it. They are pissed! I came back from a run the other day and they were literally throbbing with pain. Obviously, I am annoyed because this is interfering with my workouts, running and weight loss. But even more than that, I am really concerned. I have seen all of those commercials about people with arthritis, hobbling about. Crying about all the things they can't do. But the people are all at LEAST 60 years old so I never associated myself with having arthritis. But the other day, it became very clear to me that I am now that old person trapped in my 29 year old body. The only difference is, I suffer through the pain because I'm "tough."
I do everything the doctor's recommend to manage the pain and symptoms. And I am frustrated and annoyed with my body. I feel like it's letting me down. I take such good care of it (although this wasn't always the case), and this is the thanks I get?
I want to be able to run around with my kids, not follow them in my wheelchair!

I'm going to start looking into alternative ways to deal with this before my doctor makes me see a specialist and the specialist tells me my options are "suffering" or "surgery." I'll try anything at this point. Bring on the witch doctors!

Hello, is there anybody out there??

I know that I have said before that I am the WORST blogger EVER, but this time, I really mean it.

I apologize for my absence (if anyone has, in fact, noticed my absence). I started a new job a couple weeks ago and I am now working from home. One would think that this would give me more time to blog but, alas, it has been quite the opposite. My job requires quite a bit more travel than I have been used to, so I've basically been running around like a chicken with my head cut off. In suits. Don't get me wrong, I LOOOOOOOOOOVE my new job (even though it feels incredibly selfish and bizarre to be taking a new job as so many people are getting laid off). But this is, quite literally, my dream job.
On the days when I do get to actually spend a whole day working from home, I have been known to awake at 8:45, pour myself a cup of coffee, and stumble down to my office in the basement-complete with fizzy blanket and space heater. Then I maybe light a candle or two and get to work. Tough work, but someone's gotta do it, eh?

Then there's the weight/fitness/food stuff. I took my Body Bugg off a few weeks back and have been using it sporadically. I was so far under my calorie goals that it was depressing me. Ontop of that, I was having a hard time finding time to log food. I haven't been on the Evil Scale recently, but the last time I was, I was down 20 pounds. Last week was Philly Beer Week (which is Andrew's holy week) so I am SURE that is not the case right now. I must confess that I drank at least two beers a night for 9 consecutive days. Andrew did all 11 days. I still managed to squeeze in some good workouts on four of those days, which I think is mighty impressive considering hangovers and such.

The good news is that its finally nice outside, so I'm back to biking and running outside. I have two 5k's that I am training for: one in May and one as part of a relay triathalon in June. Both are for charity. I did my first official practice 5k yesterday and I need to shave about 8 minutes off my time. Totally do-able. Especially since I plan to get up to 10 miles by the end of the summer (so long as my arthritic knees cooperate). I have slacked off occasionally with my eating, but I am now offically over-informed about the calorie content of most foods so I am very much aware of when I'm "blowing it." Remind me to write a post about Andrew's cheesecake concoction. It has been the delicious cause of my "blowing it" on several occasions.

Mostly, I'm just glad it's Spring! We can finally get out and work on the garden(I mostly just get in the way, but I try) and sweep our street and BIKE and RUN and grill and eat outside! Not to mention all of the cute Spring clothes I have been acquiring... :-)
Happy Spring, everyone!

Pound For Pound Challenge Widget

I did it all for the homemade lunches

Whenever I tell people that for my new job (which I start in a week) I will be working from home, I always get comments like "oh, I don't know if I'm disciplined enough to do that."

Truth is, I don't know if I'm disciplined enough (yet). I am pretty sure that I will spend most days in my pjs until a most inappropriate hour. There are, obviously, many perks to the idea of working from home: the pjs, the sleeping until the last minute, the ability to work out on my lunch hour, the time to throw in a load of laundry every now and again etc etc.
But BY FAR the BEST perk of working from home is making homemade lunches!! I am SO excited not to have to spend a half hour each morning loading up various gladware containers. And even more glad that I won't have to eat crappy WaWa salads when I forget my gladware containers.

I have another snow day today so I'm working from home again (its good practice). After the gym I made a lunch that played on the ides of a 7 layer dip. I layered a pan with seitan (seasoned with chili powder, cayenne and garlic), black beans, green bell peppers, roasted red peppers, portabella, and tomatoes. I cooked it in the oven at 475 for about 20 minutes to warm it up, dumped some pepper jack cheese ontop and WOWEEE! I ate it with a few tortilla chips. YUM YUM!
Its probably not the healthiest thing ever, but I loaded it up with veggies and seitan is a great healthy meat subsitute. I can;t find the camera or I would post a picture. But trust me, its delish!
I am definitely getting used to this!

Back On the Sauce

I ran today for the first time in over a month. I was inspired by the one day of nice weather we had here in Philly today. I would have run outside but the city budget cuts have resulted in our part of the city being completely ignored after the recent snow/ice. So our streets are still death defyingly dangerous to even walk on, let alone run on. But oh man, even on the treadmill, the run was GREAT! It was such a rush, why did I stop running again? I forget...

Anyhow, it was the most amazing run! My stomach muscles are in knots, my shoulders were all tight and my knees were absolutely burning....it was AWESOME! I think I'm over that 30 Day Shred/elliptical phase I was in.
My cardio craze is back on! But this time, I'm really going to make more of an effort to keep mixing in some weight training. Because it really is more effective at burning more calories for a longer period of time. And because it makes me feel really badass.

On the menu tonight: tofu, shrimp and veggie stir fry and tofu squares with homemade plum sauce. Andrew liked the plum sauce so much he asked for more tofu. He's one of those guys who is afraid if he eats too much tofu it will increase his estrogen levels and turn him into a woman so it MUST have been good if he asked for seconds!

Tomorrow is our morning gym day so early to bed for me!
Buenos Noches!

Free Stuff!!!

Is anyone else here jealous that not enough people come to their site/blog to get free stuff sent to them?

Well I am. And I have been seeing boxes and boxes of these new Quaker Delights bars getting sent to every foodie/fit blogger I know. And it makes my mouth water bitterly while looking at their pictures.

But NO MORE! Foodbuzz has a Quaker ad on their site for a FREE SAMPLE of those tasty treats!

Now go on and get yourself some!!

Stuffed

I never post pictures of my food but I have a snow day today so I'm home tinkering around in the kitchen. I braved the weather (and a huge nasty slushy puddle) to get to the gym. I did a hard, sweaty 30 minutes on the elliptical (squeaky shoes and all) and called it a day.
While I was on the elliptical, I took a moment from reading my US Weekly to do a mental inventory of our kitchen. I'm been craving couscous lately (not sure what's up with that but..) and was considering if I should just eat it plain or attempt to pretend I'm not a complete carb whore. I cam up with a stuffed pepper! We only had one pepper left, so it worked out well.

For the filling I used about 1/4 cup couscous, 1/2 cup black beans, a diced onion, half a diced tomatoe, a cup of spinach (raw), an ounce of mexican cheese, chili powder, garlic, salt, pepper and some hot sauce. I cut the top off the pepper and cleaned it out. Then I stuffed the filling in, covered it with foil and cooked it at 375 for about 45 minutes. For the last 5 minutes, I put some extra cheese in top and broiled it. Here's the result...



















And the inside....





It was DELISH! And HUGE! And Iate almost all of it!

Maybe I'll post more pictures of my food, its kind of fun (when I'm not eating toast and cereal!)

Biting the Bullet

Here I am again today-as promised! I even sucked it up and got on the scale this morning. I'm still down 12 pounds from where I started. I did get on the scale after my workout this morning (yes, you heard right, I went to the gym this morning too!) and I heard somewhere that you're not supposed to weight yourself after you workout b/c you're always heavier. As I write this, I'm actually wondering if that's true or if I just made it up. I'm going to go google it. Hang on...

Ok, so thats kind of BS. It really doesn't make that much of a difference and our body weight fluctuates throughout the day (including before and after workouts) so I'll just accept it and say I'm down 12 pounds still (which means I've gained back about 8 pounds). But hey, I've kept it off for months and months so that's something right? RIGHT?

And I logged my food yesterday all day, like I promised I would. I've decided that I'm going to just take this one day at a time.

We haven't been grocery shopping in awhile so we've been eating a lot of non-perishable food (and eating out..but hey, it was restaurant week AND I got a new job) and my body is definitely missing the roughage. I felt like my stomach was waging war against me yesterday, shouting "Give me vegetables! I need a banana!" We didn't have much in the way of veggies at home so I gave it a Trader Joe's chicken burrito and some sauteed portabella mushrooms. It wasn't psyched. I'm making up for it today with lunch.

I made us some tasty healthy turkey spinach wraps for lunch (plus a bag of carrots and peppers for me) and insisted that Andrew not forget his apple. (He'd eat 2 bags of microwave rice for lunch everyday if he could..) I actually really enjoy packing lunches for us. Mostly because it gets me out of doing the breakfast dishes, but also because I feel like I'm contributing to our health in a productive way. Plus, it saves money. And who doesn't like saving money?!?

Two and half weeks till my birthday! I'm going to be 25 (again!)

On Accountability

I started this blog to force myself to be accountable. I knew that I would need more than moral support to be successful at this whole health/fitness/weight loss venture that I've been on. So I decided to blog. Maybe if people were reading and keeping up with me, then I would be less inclined to slack off. But part of people reading requires me to actually WRITE, which I haven't.
In fact, I have completely dropped the ball on this. And it shows. I just put my BodyBugg back on after having it off for over 3 days, I haven't logged food in over a week and I have ditched my cardio kick and am back on the 30 Day Shred.
Now, to be fair, I have had a LOT going on in my personal life and at work. I got the job I have been interviewing for (YAY!) and am now rushing to tie up as many loose ends here as I can before Feb. 13th. In addition, poor Mr. Puss has been super sick, which has put a great deal of stress on us at home. And (perhaps as a result) I've been drinking more. Not a lot more, but more than I was before the New Year.

But it's not excuse. I committed to this and have completely bailed on my commitment. For that, I apologize to the 5 of you who actually read this. These next few weeks are going to be a little crazy, but I'm dragging myself back on the wagon anyway. Which also means dragging myself back on the scale (and no, I did not get a new one, and last I checked, this one still hates me).

I think what bothers me the most about all of this is that I started this blog for me first and foremost. I'm reading everyone else's blogs and being supportive of their goals and acheivements and, at the same time, have completely ignored my own.

So, dear readers, I am dusting myself off and starting again. Tomorrow I will post where I'm at weight-wise, but I'd say that I am probably only down about 10 pounds from my starting weight, even though at one point, I was down 20. I am totally disappointed by this, but won't linger on it after I'm done this post.

"and the end of all our exploring will be to arrive where we started, and know the place for the first time"

the WORST blogger ever

Yea, that's me.

Not only have I been slacking on the blogging, I've been slacking on my gym time and food logging too. But to be fair to me, this has been an AWFUL week! Some bizarre stuff went down at work which has resulted in me taking on the work of 2 people (that's not the bizarre part, just the result of said bizarre things).
In addition to that, I had my FOURTH (yes, fourth!) interview for a new job. It is down to me and one other (older) candidate and the Board making the decision is taking a vote this afternoon! (think good thoughts for me today, we desperately need me to get this job). I am sick to my stomach anxious!

Then, on Thursday, my kitty-Mr. Puss got DEATHLY ill and had to be rushed to the Emergency Room at the UNiversity of PA vet hospital. He had a blocked urinary tract and he hadn't peed in 3 days. The doctors said they were surprised he was alive. He's badass like that. BUt he's still really sick and needs to be there for a few more days. Our other cat, Isabel, cried and cried all day yesterday looking for him. So sad. We love you, buddy!! Get well soon!

And to top it all off, every place we wanted to have our wedding ceremony is booked or blocked (and by blocked I mean the road that this one garden is on is comepletely blocked off the ENTIRE day for a regatta). So we may push the wedding back. We need more time, options and (obviously) money.

Suffice it to say, I have worked out a total of ONE times this week. I know, I suck. But I've been so drained emotionally and mentally that all I've wanted to do is sleep. And maybe have a glass of wine or two :-)
In addition, I haven't logged any food since Monday. And now I can't remember back that far.

Andrew called this "an off week" which I think is a total understatement. I promise next week will be different (and hopefully, a lot less eventful)

New Developments (or, the reason for my absence)

I admit it. I took a break from blogging for the holidays. And then I just let the break drag on a little longer, and a little longer. It finally got to the point where I had been away so long, I didn't even know what to write. I would sit there with my computer and Andrew would say "why don't you blog a little?" and I'd say "okay." And then watch an old episode of The Hills or catch up on my gossip rags. I have had negative motivation to recount all of the holiday cookies, quarts of wine, and bricks of cheese I have consumed in the past month. So I just won't. That was last year.

I thought about copping out and doing one of those "end of year" reflection surveys, but I have done so much reflection these past few weeks, that I'm pretty much over it. So I'm only looking forward now. And oh boy, do I have some EXCITING things to look forward to!!

First, I didn't gain an obscene amount of weight (just 2 or 3 pounds) and all my jeans still fit, so I'm off to a great start. I need to make actual weight loss more of a priority and less of a hobby. For real.
That means taking Andrew's advice and incorporating weights into my workouts more than once a week, integrating interval training and not being such a cardio whore. (yes, it burns calories quick, but it doesn't KEEP my body burning them throughout the day).
That also means being meticulous about my food logging. No more uncounted handfuls of crackers, bites of cheese and snippets of cookies (I totally just effed this up already and had 3 bites of a HUGE delicious cookie that I have no intention of logging with my breakfast. What? It's Saturday!)

But, perhaps the most important part is that I actually have something awesome to motivate me to lose more weight---looking SUPER HOT in a wedding dress!!
Andrew and I got engaged after New Years! We're planning to get married this year (I mean we already own a house together, so why drag it out?). That means I have some SERIOUS work to do before October! Don't worry, I promise not to make this into a wedding blog.
We've done a lot of celebrating recently so that's another reason, er excuse, for my lack of blogging.

Anyhow, we've got a busy weekend: a community meeting, a kickball game, another celebratory dinner with friends and (at some point) a workout or 2. But I promise to get back to my regularly scheduled blogging.
Happy New Year, everyone!