Thursday, March 19, 2009

Scales, Knees and Arthiritis-OH MY!

Its official, blog world. I am falling apart. And it's only natural. I mean, I DID just turn 29. I'm on the downward slope of my bell curve life.

I am really going to set my scale on fire. I got on it yesterday for the first time in a month or so and it read me a number so low, I hadn't seen it on a scale I was standing on since middle school. I immediately began celebrating and feeling awesome about myself (although in the back of my head questioning the validity of the number because I am still not in my skinny jeans and this number would have really let me fit in my skinny jeans).
I had a doctor's appointment in the afternoon, where I was just praying for the validation that my (formerly) evil scale had just given me. Oh but the doctor's scale hates me too. And I am far heavier than I thought. I have gained back all but 10 measly little pounds. And now I am back to being disappointed with myself again. Why, oh why, do we let numbers affect our feelings? (note to self: work on this).

I may have mentioned in my last post about my arthritis. I got diagnosed with it (in my knees) when I was 20. At the time, it was no big deal. I was in college, rowing, running and competing every weekend. Now, at 29, it feels like a death sentence.
When I was first diagnosed, I was given a prescription to manage the pain and inflammation. It made me see black spots. So I stopped taking it and began a years-long dependency to ibuprofen, glucosamine, and ice.
For many many years this worked pretty well. But recently, my knees are having none of it. They are pissed! I came back from a run the other day and they were literally throbbing with pain. Obviously, I am annoyed because this is interfering with my workouts, running and weight loss. But even more than that, I am really concerned. I have seen all of those commercials about people with arthritis, hobbling about. Crying about all the things they can't do. But the people are all at LEAST 60 years old so I never associated myself with having arthritis. But the other day, it became very clear to me that I am now that old person trapped in my 29 year old body. The only difference is, I suffer through the pain because I'm "tough."
I do everything the doctor's recommend to manage the pain and symptoms. And I am frustrated and annoyed with my body. I feel like it's letting me down. I take such good care of it (although this wasn't always the case), and this is the thanks I get?
I want to be able to run around with my kids, not follow them in my wheelchair!

I'm going to start looking into alternative ways to deal with this before my doctor makes me see a specialist and the specialist tells me my options are "suffering" or "surgery." I'll try anything at this point. Bring on the witch doctors!

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Hello, is there anybody out there??

I know that I have said before that I am the WORST blogger EVER, but this time, I really mean it.

I apologize for my absence (if anyone has, in fact, noticed my absence). I started a new job a couple weeks ago and I am now working from home. One would think that this would give me more time to blog but, alas, it has been quite the opposite. My job requires quite a bit more travel than I have been used to, so I've basically been running around like a chicken with my head cut off. In suits. Don't get me wrong, I LOOOOOOOOOOVE my new job (even though it feels incredibly selfish and bizarre to be taking a new job as so many people are getting laid off). But this is, quite literally, my dream job.
On the days when I do get to actually spend a whole day working from home, I have been known to awake at 8:45, pour myself a cup of coffee, and stumble down to my office in the basement-complete with fizzy blanket and space heater. Then I maybe light a candle or two and get to work. Tough work, but someone's gotta do it, eh?

Then there's the weight/fitness/food stuff. I took my Body Bugg off a few weeks back and have been using it sporadically. I was so far under my calorie goals that it was depressing me. Ontop of that, I was having a hard time finding time to log food. I haven't been on the Evil Scale recently, but the last time I was, I was down 20 pounds. Last week was Philly Beer Week (which is Andrew's holy week) so I am SURE that is not the case right now. I must confess that I drank at least two beers a night for 9 consecutive days. Andrew did all 11 days. I still managed to squeeze in some good workouts on four of those days, which I think is mighty impressive considering hangovers and such.

The good news is that its finally nice outside, so I'm back to biking and running outside. I have two 5k's that I am training for: one in May and one as part of a relay triathalon in June. Both are for charity. I did my first official practice 5k yesterday and I need to shave about 8 minutes off my time. Totally do-able. Especially since I plan to get up to 10 miles by the end of the summer (so long as my arthritic knees cooperate). I have slacked off occasionally with my eating, but I am now offically over-informed about the calorie content of most foods so I am very much aware of when I'm "blowing it." Remind me to write a post about Andrew's cheesecake concoction. It has been the delicious cause of my "blowing it" on several occasions.

Mostly, I'm just glad it's Spring! We can finally get out and work on the garden(I mostly just get in the way, but I try) and sweep our street and BIKE and RUN and grill and eat outside! Not to mention all of the cute Spring clothes I have been acquiring... :-)
Happy Spring, everyone!